Late again for work and as I catch my own reflection in my bedroom mirror I almost scream at the sight of my panda eyes and hair which has an uncanny resemblence to Russell Brand 's on a bad day and so my straightener hunt begins.....
My Vodka induced self last night some how managed to turn my beautiful bedrooom into a bomb site in a matter of minutes in my attempt to find my bed, which in all honesty hadn't moved anywhere it stood where it always had but in my drunken mess I thought we were playing a game of hide and seek, He hid I destroyed the whole contents of my room on a utterly pointless seeking session. Not sure why I just refered my bed to he as i am she and it is a very feminine bed? maybe I want it to be a he, maybe I want to be he, 'What the hell I am thinking'!.
Stubbing my cigarette out in what I hope is an ashtray - without my glasses I am blind - I really am , everybody always thinks that as a joke or an over the top exagerration but I really am for example my 86 year old lady neighbour has much better eye sight than me, she often calls me out from shouting through my letterbox luring me into a false sense of security and making me think she needs help with something but in reality she wants me out of my flat for her own entertainment and ego stroking!We often play the game 'Is that the postman coming?' which I have now learnt is just for her to stand there and be amused by my squinting and for her to say 'ooo isn't your eye sight bad, you know I saw him from right the way down there - you really should go to specsaver's dear they can help you'.
Enough of Doris and her cruel O.A.P bullying I have a job to get to and I am almost certain that I will yet again be late much to the delight of my German boss I am sure.
My Vodka induced self last night some how managed to turn my beautiful bedrooom into a bomb site in a matter of minutes in my attempt to find my bed, which in all honesty hadn't moved anywhere it stood where it always had but in my drunken mess I thought we were playing a game of hide and seek, He hid I destroyed the whole contents of my room on a utterly pointless seeking session. Not sure why I just refered my bed to he as i am she and it is a very feminine bed? maybe I want it to be a he, maybe I want to be he, 'What the hell I am thinking'!.
Stubbing my cigarette out in what I hope is an ashtray - without my glasses I am blind - I really am , everybody always thinks that as a joke or an over the top exagerration but I really am for example my 86 year old lady neighbour has much better eye sight than me, she often calls me out from shouting through my letterbox luring me into a false sense of security and making me think she needs help with something but in reality she wants me out of my flat for her own entertainment and ego stroking!We often play the game 'Is that the postman coming?' which I have now learnt is just for her to stand there and be amused by my squinting and for her to say 'ooo isn't your eye sight bad, you know I saw him from right the way down there - you really should go to specsaver's dear they can help you'.
Enough of Doris and her cruel O.A.P bullying I have a job to get to and I am almost certain that I will yet again be late much to the delight of my German boss I am sure.
Boy, I miss the good old days!
ReplyDeleteHugs and Mocha,
Stesha